I'm sure you've all heard of the British Navy slogan of staying calm and just carry on with your duties.When someone said that to me a couple of weeks back my first reaction was, that was kinda a silly thing to say, but after some thought it was the perfect thing for me to hear. Its so amazing to me that really that is all it takes. When a stressful situation arises, all you have to do is breathe deep to keep the mind and body relaxed and the soul will truly reveal the path that we are all looking for.
Of course along the way there are lessons to be learned, patterns to be recognized and continual love to give. I realized that I love myself and the person I have become. I love being healthy, I value exercising, I envision my future. Even though I feel I am off my path I know I will be back on it soon. I just need to reach a little deeper to see the truth. I am not afraid to do the work needed.
I have layed out steps to create the life I would like to live. See it, action it, live it. Are there fears, anxiety, false beliefs. Yes of course there is, but I know they are there. I won't hide them, I will look at them head on and break them down as soon as I see them.
I can't predict the future for me or anyone else so why live in the future. Live for now! Be spontaneous, question, read, learn, love, experience. You have every second just waiting for you to awaken your mind, body and soul. Don't wait - do it now.
With winter approaching, a lot of people I know start to hibernate. I love winter. I can't wait to skate, cross country ski, snowshoe, walk in the snow on a sunny afternoon. Go for coffee, meet a friend, workout hard, get a massage, listen, talk, write, create. Be the person you truly are. It is time to awaken and become whole.
As I continue on my path more than ever I feel the pull of energy to awaken my mind, body and soul to be the person I am truly meant to be. I hope you awaken today. Be the person you truly feel you are meant to be.
Sunday 13 November 2011
Saturday 15 October 2011
Listen to How You Feel
Mid October already. My goal was to write a blog at the beginning of each month. Maybe setting goals are just guidelines, maybe meant for adjustment of time depending on "life". I may not have met my goal of October 1, but I'm truly not going to beat myself up over it. Yup I'm 15 days late and thats okay by me. The key for me is that I'm here today writing. Writing about my life, love, what makes me laugh, what makes me cry, what I've learned since the last blog and how I continue to search for my path all the while awakening my body, mind and soul.
I continue to do some deep soul searching, trying to find the answers which are already within to questions, tough questions that I really want to deal with rather than push into my unconscious side of me.
I left my full time job in September (now a .4). I feel happy about that decision. That was awesome, brings a smile to my face thinking about it. I was in a job that I did not like. I knew I could not continue doing full time HR. Too negative, too heavy on my mind, which meant my body was neglected. The ironic part, I had more time to workout but with the knee still rehabbing and a rotator cuff that just can't seem to heal I chose to quit going to Crossfit. That decision alone made me feel sad. The competitiveness the motivation from others to work hard was like nothing I had ever experienced before. I wanted to become stronger, more lean and most of all work out with WN. I also learned the motivation needs to come from me, within and I know WN and I will bond in another way.
I know that I am choosing not to take the chance of injuring my body. So with the knee doing well I will continue to bike a lot, now indoors for winter and use the cross trainer and rower to get cardio. The weights I continue to lift, just not a lot of over head until that darn shoulder heals. I still practise yoga which I love. The stretching of muscle tissue, the relaxing of the mind the connecting of mind and body is totally outrageously healing. I have been blessed to open my own small space in my house for others to come and practice with me on Friday mornings.
I design an exercise program for a young man once a week and workout with him. Truly this is where I feel so good. Teaching others what Wendy taught me about fitness, conditioning, weight training, healthy eating etc. I went last week to Calgary to take the Personal Training Specialist course through Canfit Pro. Months ago I thought this was a daunting task, not for me, never would I get through it, not smart enough, not capable, all the fears, anxiety etc that we all have when trying something new. I'm constantly reminded of Christine's comment, "how do you know you won't like it', "did you know you liked chocolate before you tried it". We don't know anything unless we try, unless we learn, unless we are willing to change.
So I've changed. My attitude, my knowledge, my body, my understanding of self, my job, my future. I don't want to stop ever! Life is about constant change, evolving even when we don't think we want to. The cool thing for me is that I feel this is the right path. Everyone I meet, every experience I have is meant to be. There are no coincidences. When I was checking in for my flight leaving Calgary, something inside told me to book row 17 no other seats were booked in that row at that time. When boarding, I had a young couple sit down beside me. Had the best chat with both of them. And I know we were meant to meet and at some point our paths will cross again. I have met soooo many people in the last 6 months, now that I am more open to meeting people, trying new experiences, opening my heart and loving my life.
I continue each and every day to awaken my body, mind and soul. There is so much more I will learn, experience, feel, try. Yes there is still fear, anxiety, doubt etc. but each time I feel a negative I ask why. Why do I feel this way, now. What is happening at this moment to make me feel this way. And then I choose how to deal with that feeling. No one else can choose for me. I am here to create my life, to manifest how I choose to live within this plane of existence. I'll make mistakes, may feel regret for sure, but each moment will awaken me even more, allowing not just for existence but for truly LIVING.
I continue to do some deep soul searching, trying to find the answers which are already within to questions, tough questions that I really want to deal with rather than push into my unconscious side of me.
I left my full time job in September (now a .4). I feel happy about that decision. That was awesome, brings a smile to my face thinking about it. I was in a job that I did not like. I knew I could not continue doing full time HR. Too negative, too heavy on my mind, which meant my body was neglected. The ironic part, I had more time to workout but with the knee still rehabbing and a rotator cuff that just can't seem to heal I chose to quit going to Crossfit. That decision alone made me feel sad. The competitiveness the motivation from others to work hard was like nothing I had ever experienced before. I wanted to become stronger, more lean and most of all work out with WN. I also learned the motivation needs to come from me, within and I know WN and I will bond in another way.
I know that I am choosing not to take the chance of injuring my body. So with the knee doing well I will continue to bike a lot, now indoors for winter and use the cross trainer and rower to get cardio. The weights I continue to lift, just not a lot of over head until that darn shoulder heals. I still practise yoga which I love. The stretching of muscle tissue, the relaxing of the mind the connecting of mind and body is totally outrageously healing. I have been blessed to open my own small space in my house for others to come and practice with me on Friday mornings.
I design an exercise program for a young man once a week and workout with him. Truly this is where I feel so good. Teaching others what Wendy taught me about fitness, conditioning, weight training, healthy eating etc. I went last week to Calgary to take the Personal Training Specialist course through Canfit Pro. Months ago I thought this was a daunting task, not for me, never would I get through it, not smart enough, not capable, all the fears, anxiety etc that we all have when trying something new. I'm constantly reminded of Christine's comment, "how do you know you won't like it', "did you know you liked chocolate before you tried it". We don't know anything unless we try, unless we learn, unless we are willing to change.
So I've changed. My attitude, my knowledge, my body, my understanding of self, my job, my future. I don't want to stop ever! Life is about constant change, evolving even when we don't think we want to. The cool thing for me is that I feel this is the right path. Everyone I meet, every experience I have is meant to be. There are no coincidences. When I was checking in for my flight leaving Calgary, something inside told me to book row 17 no other seats were booked in that row at that time. When boarding, I had a young couple sit down beside me. Had the best chat with both of them. And I know we were meant to meet and at some point our paths will cross again. I have met soooo many people in the last 6 months, now that I am more open to meeting people, trying new experiences, opening my heart and loving my life.
I continue each and every day to awaken my body, mind and soul. There is so much more I will learn, experience, feel, try. Yes there is still fear, anxiety, doubt etc. but each time I feel a negative I ask why. Why do I feel this way, now. What is happening at this moment to make me feel this way. And then I choose how to deal with that feeling. No one else can choose for me. I am here to create my life, to manifest how I choose to live within this plane of existence. I'll make mistakes, may feel regret for sure, but each moment will awaken me even more, allowing not just for existence but for truly LIVING.
Wednesday 14 September 2011
A Glance Back, but Look Forward.
A New Season- is here whether we like it or not and with the cooler temperatures comes more layers of clothing to keep us warm. But inside my body is the heat from a glowing heart, stoked by a summer of change. I worked hard this summer to rid myself of past false beliefs, to look inside myself and to find my true love, passion, who I am, figuring out what is my purpose. Even though I've learned a lot about me, I still have a lot of questions, a lot of learning and a lot of growth to do.
I grew my hair out- I like it better that way
I got a tattoo- I love it and makes me shiver when I think about the pain I felt then and the love it brings me now- totally worth it. (mmm I wonder if theres a 2nd one on the horizon).
I quit working full time at a job I didn't like and work 2 days a week at a job I feel challenged by, inspired by an want to be at- (at the time of writing this it Has only been 2 days-lol ask me in a month time- how I feel).
I started teaching a beginner yoga class in my house (yup created a mini studio for mini classes right in my living room- who needs a living room anyway?)
I work with a young man who has Down's syndrome and his mom at their house teaching yoga to and exercising with- I am so grateful for this opportunity.
I had some head shots taken from a fool around photo shoot with Jim Patrick- the nicest guy with the most beautiful wife ever!
I had my second, 15 minutes of fame- got to be on Girl Talk Radio with Marlo Boux- check it out www.girltalkwithmarlo.com
I worked on opening my heart and throat chakras to the highest and best possible for this time and I truly feel the energy within me flowing more freely.
I reconnected with family, made new connections on Facebook, in my neighbourhood with the wonderful Adrianne Percy- because my gut told me to stop and buy lemonade from 2 kids
I made new relationships at work and by other social media means.
I rode my bike more and loved it more than I thought- I can't wait to get a trainer for it and ride all yr around.
I ended up on crutches for a week and hobbling for several more, which taught me many lessons- way to many to go into here- and I shed a few tears. I realized how important my health and wellbeing is to me and I need to do for me what is best- not do what others tell me or expect me to do. I need to be honest about how I feel at any moment with myself and others.
Like the seasons changing so has my life, I'm excited, scared, nervous, at the same time at peace with the decisions I've made and know which way I'm headed in the future. My path may wander sideways but I know I am moving forward all the same.
Just like the seasons changing in order to bring growth and new life, my life is changing for me to grow and bring new energy into it. I'm excited about my future, about learning new things, meeting new people, experiencing new activities, eating new foods, creating and connecting- thats living!
Just like with the seasons changing- some things die, some things will never be the same, some people leave, sometimes I may not want to look at and question the negative feelings and emotions- I have to and will in order to keep me connected, balanced and whole.
As I continue on my journey to awaken my mind, body and soul I look back on the last season and smile, feeling grateful for the experiences and for the lessons. I will try and take those lessons forward, continuing on my path with grace and humility.
Thank you to all who listen, speak, share and care and help connect me to the bigger picture!
I grew my hair out- I like it better that way
I got a tattoo- I love it and makes me shiver when I think about the pain I felt then and the love it brings me now- totally worth it. (mmm I wonder if theres a 2nd one on the horizon).
I quit working full time at a job I didn't like and work 2 days a week at a job I feel challenged by, inspired by an want to be at- (at the time of writing this it Has only been 2 days-lol ask me in a month time- how I feel).
I started teaching a beginner yoga class in my house (yup created a mini studio for mini classes right in my living room- who needs a living room anyway?)
I work with a young man who has Down's syndrome and his mom at their house teaching yoga to and exercising with- I am so grateful for this opportunity.
I had some head shots taken from a fool around photo shoot with Jim Patrick- the nicest guy with the most beautiful wife ever!
I had my second, 15 minutes of fame- got to be on Girl Talk Radio with Marlo Boux- check it out www.girltalkwithmarlo.com
I worked on opening my heart and throat chakras to the highest and best possible for this time and I truly feel the energy within me flowing more freely.
I reconnected with family, made new connections on Facebook, in my neighbourhood with the wonderful Adrianne Percy- because my gut told me to stop and buy lemonade from 2 kids
I made new relationships at work and by other social media means.
I rode my bike more and loved it more than I thought- I can't wait to get a trainer for it and ride all yr around.
I ended up on crutches for a week and hobbling for several more, which taught me many lessons- way to many to go into here- and I shed a few tears. I realized how important my health and wellbeing is to me and I need to do for me what is best- not do what others tell me or expect me to do. I need to be honest about how I feel at any moment with myself and others.
Like the seasons changing so has my life, I'm excited, scared, nervous, at the same time at peace with the decisions I've made and know which way I'm headed in the future. My path may wander sideways but I know I am moving forward all the same.
Just like the seasons changing in order to bring growth and new life, my life is changing for me to grow and bring new energy into it. I'm excited about my future, about learning new things, meeting new people, experiencing new activities, eating new foods, creating and connecting- thats living!
Just like with the seasons changing- some things die, some things will never be the same, some people leave, sometimes I may not want to look at and question the negative feelings and emotions- I have to and will in order to keep me connected, balanced and whole.
As I continue on my journey to awaken my mind, body and soul I look back on the last season and smile, feeling grateful for the experiences and for the lessons. I will try and take those lessons forward, continuing on my path with grace and humility.
Thank you to all who listen, speak, share and care and help connect me to the bigger picture!
Monday 8 August 2011
Summer of Change
The summer of 2011 has sure been one to remember for a lot of people I know, myself included. A lot of changes have happened already and there is still a good month left of warm, sunny beach days for the winds of change to blow through.
I know people who have fallen in love, fallen out of love, reconnected with their true spirit, lost loved ones, renewed old friendships, received bad news about a loved ones health, started running for the first time, ran a marathon, an ironman, bought a road bike, changed jobs, changed the way they feel about themselves, lost weight, changed hair colour, got a tattoo, moved, bought a boat, etc. It just seems to me that this summer brought about a lot of change for a lot of people.
Maybe this type of change the fluidness of life has always been there and I'm just more in tune, living more in the moment and more connected to more people than I ever have been. I feel and see a lot more energy, emotion and connectedness with people.
I've awakened my spirit immensely and challenged my body and acknowledged my thoughts. I've moved forward with my dreams and visions for what I want in life. I know I'm on the right path as I've had many deja vus this summer. I've had many learning moments which created growth each and every time and I cherish those learning moments and know a lot more lessons are to be learned.
I've spent more time at the beach on the sand, in the sun and in the water than ever before. I lay on the grass, appreciate the trees, listen to the birds and squirrels and smell the flowers. I love my summer life and can't wait to create the rest of it. I appreciate all the people I have met and conversed with this summer and can't wait to meet and chat with more of my soul mates.
Summer is a great time to feel the warmth and love from within, appreciate, learn, grow, feel, move, touch, listen, laugh--- LIVE.
I know people who have fallen in love, fallen out of love, reconnected with their true spirit, lost loved ones, renewed old friendships, received bad news about a loved ones health, started running for the first time, ran a marathon, an ironman, bought a road bike, changed jobs, changed the way they feel about themselves, lost weight, changed hair colour, got a tattoo, moved, bought a boat, etc. It just seems to me that this summer brought about a lot of change for a lot of people.
Maybe this type of change the fluidness of life has always been there and I'm just more in tune, living more in the moment and more connected to more people than I ever have been. I feel and see a lot more energy, emotion and connectedness with people.
I've awakened my spirit immensely and challenged my body and acknowledged my thoughts. I've moved forward with my dreams and visions for what I want in life. I know I'm on the right path as I've had many deja vus this summer. I've had many learning moments which created growth each and every time and I cherish those learning moments and know a lot more lessons are to be learned.
I've spent more time at the beach on the sand, in the sun and in the water than ever before. I lay on the grass, appreciate the trees, listen to the birds and squirrels and smell the flowers. I love my summer life and can't wait to create the rest of it. I appreciate all the people I have met and conversed with this summer and can't wait to meet and chat with more of my soul mates.
Summer is a great time to feel the warmth and love from within, appreciate, learn, grow, feel, move, touch, listen, laugh--- LIVE.
Tuesday 12 July 2011
Know Your Shadow
So here I was just going along with life as it was a big bowl of cherries. Sweet and juicy and all is well; well only half was well. The amazing thing to me is that I knew what I was doing but didn't want to face it I'm sure. It took an amazingly intuitive friend to be honest with me as to how they saw me and it wasn't real pretty.
Over the past little while I was trying to make my life so perfect, so fun, so good, that I wasn't willing to see anything else. What I actually was doing was causing a split within me, a seperation of my conscious and unconscious state. Instead of reflecting and questioning and working through the negative feelings of the unconscious, I was hiding them, pushing them back deeper and deeper. After all they were the "bad" and I wanted to be good, right? Well what I was actually doing was allowing the negatives of the unconscious to grow and have power over me, without me realizing it.
It took a lot of tears, alone time, really pulling deep into the fears and all the negative emotions and coming to the understanding the self is me and I am the conscious and unconscious together- that make me whole. I can't give power to the negatives but must recognize and work through the emotions which in turn will lesson their power over me.
I felt like I tore through a wall of seperation to start rebuilding, recreating my true self. For 2 days I barely ate, slept or talked. Just questioned, wrote and allowed feelings to truly rise. So instead of limiting myself, limiting others, feeling scared to be on my own, feeling fear of not being truly loved or fear of the future, guilt, shame, attachment, etc etc and there were alot I was trying to push deep down. I know by recognizing and dealing with the unconscious will allow me to grow and create the life I truly will love.
Now that the wall has been dismantled, the work begins to rebuild, recreate a new self. I am thank full for the people around me who ask me what they can do to help. Really a little energy healing, a little guidance from friends and a whole lot of choices to make. Understanding myself is the first step in understanding the world I live in and how I can do what makes me happy, be successful, help my community, be a loved one to others and love others openly and deeply. I need to figure out my vision, what I truly want, what my values are and start living towards the life that will fullfil me during this time on earth.
The self is fluid and changes as we experience and learn and grow and that is exciting to me. I know I am whole when I recognize, admit and workthrough the feelings in my shadow which is an inspiring part of me just like the conscious is. There is ongoing work, a constant reflection of feelings, but the recognition of the shadow was huge for me and I will continue to get to know my whole self the conscious and unconscious together as one.
As I follow my path on my never ending journey this is a time I will look back and say I learned a huge lesson, I am so grateful for as it will truly help me awaken my body, mind and soul.
I am grateful for the writings of Deepak Chopra- I have learned so much
Over the past little while I was trying to make my life so perfect, so fun, so good, that I wasn't willing to see anything else. What I actually was doing was causing a split within me, a seperation of my conscious and unconscious state. Instead of reflecting and questioning and working through the negative feelings of the unconscious, I was hiding them, pushing them back deeper and deeper. After all they were the "bad" and I wanted to be good, right? Well what I was actually doing was allowing the negatives of the unconscious to grow and have power over me, without me realizing it.
It took a lot of tears, alone time, really pulling deep into the fears and all the negative emotions and coming to the understanding the self is me and I am the conscious and unconscious together- that make me whole. I can't give power to the negatives but must recognize and work through the emotions which in turn will lesson their power over me.
I felt like I tore through a wall of seperation to start rebuilding, recreating my true self. For 2 days I barely ate, slept or talked. Just questioned, wrote and allowed feelings to truly rise. So instead of limiting myself, limiting others, feeling scared to be on my own, feeling fear of not being truly loved or fear of the future, guilt, shame, attachment, etc etc and there were alot I was trying to push deep down. I know by recognizing and dealing with the unconscious will allow me to grow and create the life I truly will love.
Now that the wall has been dismantled, the work begins to rebuild, recreate a new self. I am thank full for the people around me who ask me what they can do to help. Really a little energy healing, a little guidance from friends and a whole lot of choices to make. Understanding myself is the first step in understanding the world I live in and how I can do what makes me happy, be successful, help my community, be a loved one to others and love others openly and deeply. I need to figure out my vision, what I truly want, what my values are and start living towards the life that will fullfil me during this time on earth.
The self is fluid and changes as we experience and learn and grow and that is exciting to me. I know I am whole when I recognize, admit and workthrough the feelings in my shadow which is an inspiring part of me just like the conscious is. There is ongoing work, a constant reflection of feelings, but the recognition of the shadow was huge for me and I will continue to get to know my whole self the conscious and unconscious together as one.
As I follow my path on my never ending journey this is a time I will look back and say I learned a huge lesson, I am so grateful for as it will truly help me awaken my body, mind and soul.
I am grateful for the writings of Deepak Chopra- I have learned so much
Tuesday 28 June 2011
Introspection
I thought last week was a bad week for me. I seemed to have tore the miniscus in my left knee according to my physio (whom I would trust with my life). There was lots of swelling and pain and the use of crutches. For 3 days while I mostly layed on my back with leg iced and elevated I thought, I cried, I sang to myself but mostly I felt sad that I could not do the things I loved.
I could not ride my road bike, I could not go to crossfit, I could not go to yoga. I could not be active the way I wanted to be. When I closed my eyes and reached for the inner peace within, how precious my health was, kept coming at me in my thoughts. How fortunate I am that I can go ride, go to the gym, practice yoga and that every chance I get to do any activities, I will do at my very best, I will push myself to give it my all and never say I can't. I will always try at 100%.
I felt in my soul how important my health was and being active was to me. A true value in my heart that I want to nourish and grow. I've had many minor injuries in the past, but never looked at it quite this way before. I looked back at the times when I gave up, didn't push myself to do just one more, didn't push beyond the wall.
While looking inside myself I also saw that my injury was just that an injury, something that will heal. Why was I being such a baby over cartilidge. I wasn't loosing a limb, I wasn't being diagnosed with a disease, I wasn't given a timeline to live. My injury is nothing compared to what some people are going through. I saw that I am so fortunate and a small injury like mine pales in comparison to others.
The physical pain and egotiscal sadness I felt, is so minor compared to what Brandi and her family were going through. The unknown diagnosis, care plan, future. The strength from within that Brandi has, to learn, live and grow through her father in laws experience.
Introspection gave me the words, the peace, the love, the healing from within so as I journey to awaken my body mind and soul I will feel more of the connection an alignment with my true values which will allow me to give more of my love, strength, peace and healing to others like Brandi and her family.
I could not ride my road bike, I could not go to crossfit, I could not go to yoga. I could not be active the way I wanted to be. When I closed my eyes and reached for the inner peace within, how precious my health was, kept coming at me in my thoughts. How fortunate I am that I can go ride, go to the gym, practice yoga and that every chance I get to do any activities, I will do at my very best, I will push myself to give it my all and never say I can't. I will always try at 100%.
I felt in my soul how important my health was and being active was to me. A true value in my heart that I want to nourish and grow. I've had many minor injuries in the past, but never looked at it quite this way before. I looked back at the times when I gave up, didn't push myself to do just one more, didn't push beyond the wall.
While looking inside myself I also saw that my injury was just that an injury, something that will heal. Why was I being such a baby over cartilidge. I wasn't loosing a limb, I wasn't being diagnosed with a disease, I wasn't given a timeline to live. My injury is nothing compared to what some people are going through. I saw that I am so fortunate and a small injury like mine pales in comparison to others.
The physical pain and egotiscal sadness I felt, is so minor compared to what Brandi and her family were going through. The unknown diagnosis, care plan, future. The strength from within that Brandi has, to learn, live and grow through her father in laws experience.
Introspection gave me the words, the peace, the love, the healing from within so as I journey to awaken my body mind and soul I will feel more of the connection an alignment with my true values which will allow me to give more of my love, strength, peace and healing to others like Brandi and her family.
Thursday 9 June 2011
COURAGE
My best pal Wendy had a photoshoot done a few weeks ago and I had the wonderful opportunity to see it happen live. I learned alot about cameras, lighting and background. I learned about makeup, hair and eye lashes and how much patience it takes and how many wardrobe changes are needed for a shoot. But what I learned most about was the courage it takes to be the model.
As a sexy, fit woman Wendy is so comfortable within her own skin. She likes the way she looks and really doesn't give a damn what others think. I like that attitude. Wendy's pictures exuded her confidence with her body, mind and soul which I so admire. Some women looked at the pictures and were very judgemental instantly. Not seeing the beautiful, fit, sexy woman. Not seeing the courage it took to model. Some women were jealous I'm sure, angry that they don't have the courage to be the model.
Some women like me, saw the pictures and said, shit I'd love to have a body that I feel so good and confident with that I too would have the courage to do a photoshoot. There is no more pure, whole beauty than a woman, a fit, sexy woman half naked. I know all the guys would agree.
As I awaken my body, mind and soul I hope one day to allow my courage to rise and open enough to allow me to be the model. To show my fit, sexy body in photos just as I want! For people to see the shots and say that is a beautiful picture and for me to say it took a lot of courage and I'm glad I did it!
As a sexy, fit woman Wendy is so comfortable within her own skin. She likes the way she looks and really doesn't give a damn what others think. I like that attitude. Wendy's pictures exuded her confidence with her body, mind and soul which I so admire. Some women looked at the pictures and were very judgemental instantly. Not seeing the beautiful, fit, sexy woman. Not seeing the courage it took to model. Some women were jealous I'm sure, angry that they don't have the courage to be the model.
Some women like me, saw the pictures and said, shit I'd love to have a body that I feel so good and confident with that I too would have the courage to do a photoshoot. There is no more pure, whole beauty than a woman, a fit, sexy woman half naked. I know all the guys would agree.
As I awaken my body, mind and soul I hope one day to allow my courage to rise and open enough to allow me to be the model. To show my fit, sexy body in photos just as I want! For people to see the shots and say that is a beautiful picture and for me to say it took a lot of courage and I'm glad I did it!
Tuesday 31 May 2011
Decisions
When someone close to me is struggling with negative emotions, having a hard time making a decision or feeling unsettled but doesn't know why, I am there as a mother, wife, daughter , sister, friend to lean on. I think I was born to be a listener, a non judger, a sounding board someone who will be curious, to help you find your own answers.
When I am struggling to find an answer I turn my thoughts inward. I can't let anyone tell me what to do, whatever decisions I make have to feel right in my soul. Then and only then can I move forward with my life. I too look for someone to talk out my decision, but it is ultimately my decision, for me.
Recently I've been faced with a few decisions, a few forks in the road. Which path to take, what is the right thing to do, what feels right in my soul, not what my ego is telling me. The more I understand my false beliefs, my fears, my values and start creating the life that is fullfilling and whole the more settled I feel.
There are no less decisions to be made, but I think I embrace making them, they are not a chore but an opportunity. I now look forward to more opportunities to help me down my path to find what is really inside my mind, body and soul.
When I am struggling to find an answer I turn my thoughts inward. I can't let anyone tell me what to do, whatever decisions I make have to feel right in my soul. Then and only then can I move forward with my life. I too look for someone to talk out my decision, but it is ultimately my decision, for me.
Recently I've been faced with a few decisions, a few forks in the road. Which path to take, what is the right thing to do, what feels right in my soul, not what my ego is telling me. The more I understand my false beliefs, my fears, my values and start creating the life that is fullfilling and whole the more settled I feel.
There are no less decisions to be made, but I think I embrace making them, they are not a chore but an opportunity. I now look forward to more opportunities to help me down my path to find what is really inside my mind, body and soul.
Thursday 12 May 2011
The Soul
About a year ago I decided I needed to change my life. I knew the weight loss needed to happen and it has. I knew I had to change my way of thinking, my mind controlls my body so I must learn to say positive thoughts, to motivate to create a picture in my mind of who I wanted to be and this has started to happen. I think its always work and in progress and forever needs tweeking.
But I was still searching for more. My mind and body were changing but something was still missing. Through the help of a good friend I realized I wasn't connected to my soul. I needed a connection I verbalized a missing connection I just couldnt' figure out what that was.
To me it was my inner self. I was missing who I was inside, the love for myself, the openess of my soul so I could truly feel the love and light I had within. I have an amazing amount of energy within from my base to my crown and the more I feel each energy chakra opening the more I feel alive inside and the more love, light and energy I can give.
I believe in the guidance of my soul. The truth within I can not dismiss. When I follow the truth and connection I feel, all is good all is right and all is whole. As I journey to continue to understand and learn about my mind, body and soul I know I will open and embrace and create the life that feels right for me.
But I was still searching for more. My mind and body were changing but something was still missing. Through the help of a good friend I realized I wasn't connected to my soul. I needed a connection I verbalized a missing connection I just couldnt' figure out what that was.
To me it was my inner self. I was missing who I was inside, the love for myself, the openess of my soul so I could truly feel the love and light I had within. I have an amazing amount of energy within from my base to my crown and the more I feel each energy chakra opening the more I feel alive inside and the more love, light and energy I can give.
I believe in the guidance of my soul. The truth within I can not dismiss. When I follow the truth and connection I feel, all is good all is right and all is whole. As I journey to continue to understand and learn about my mind, body and soul I know I will open and embrace and create the life that feels right for me.
Thursday 5 May 2011
Why is Money so Important?
During the course of our lives here on earth we must have money to live. We know that. We go to school so we can graduate with a degree, diploma, specialized training, etc. Why - so we can get good jobs and make a lot of money, right. So often we get stuck in a job we don't even like. It makes us miserable. So we're makin money all right- and we're depressed, overweight and feel stuck!
What if we don't care about making a alot of money. What if we care more about working in a career we love even if it doesn't make a lot of money. What if material things aren't so important that we don't work full time. Maybe some people are in jobs or careers they love, then they should continue. And if material things are important to them, then great! Good for you.
I want to create my life where I am in a job that I like, I will create my own level of success on my own terms, I will spend my money on what I want. I will be passionate about what I do in life to make money, not do it because I have to. I want to get up every morning excited about going to work, to make my day worth living and if money comes from that- Great!
As I journey down my path to find what is really inside my body, mind and soul I search for my career passion, that will make my life on this earth, balanced, fullfilled and whole.
What if we don't care about making a alot of money. What if we care more about working in a career we love even if it doesn't make a lot of money. What if material things aren't so important that we don't work full time. Maybe some people are in jobs or careers they love, then they should continue. And if material things are important to them, then great! Good for you.
I want to create my life where I am in a job that I like, I will create my own level of success on my own terms, I will spend my money on what I want. I will be passionate about what I do in life to make money, not do it because I have to. I want to get up every morning excited about going to work, to make my day worth living and if money comes from that- Great!
As I journey down my path to find what is really inside my body, mind and soul I search for my career passion, that will make my life on this earth, balanced, fullfilled and whole.
Tuesday 3 May 2011
Food for the Soul
I just finished a great meal with my husband and I was reflecting on why I felt sooo good. The green color of the kale, the whole wheat pasta, red pepper. The wholeness, freshness and color was vibrant and pulling me in. The smell of garlic and pine nuts roasting, awoke my senses.
Combined and served on a white plate the food looked and smelled amazing. The shaving of parmagiano reggiano sparkling on top like snow glistening on a mountain top. My mouth salivating for a taste. The wine glass half full of a blackberry inspired Australian. The enjoyment to my eyes and palate this meal brought.
As I savored my first bite I looked up at my husband across the table and realized the food is only as good as the love given to make the meal and the love felt for the one I was sharing the meal with.
Good food tastes even better by the company you keep while enoying it. As I journey down my path to find the truth in my body mind and soul, I look ahead with excitement at the many delicious meals I have yet to eat, with the beautiful souls I have yet to share those meals with.
Combined and served on a white plate the food looked and smelled amazing. The shaving of parmagiano reggiano sparkling on top like snow glistening on a mountain top. My mouth salivating for a taste. The wine glass half full of a blackberry inspired Australian. The enjoyment to my eyes and palate this meal brought.
As I savored my first bite I looked up at my husband across the table and realized the food is only as good as the love given to make the meal and the love felt for the one I was sharing the meal with.
Good food tastes even better by the company you keep while enoying it. As I journey down my path to find the truth in my body mind and soul, I look ahead with excitement at the many delicious meals I have yet to eat, with the beautiful souls I have yet to share those meals with.
Monday 2 May 2011
The Gift of Friendship
So many people come into our lives at so many different times and each one touches us in a special way. Some people will be an introduction only, some you will see everyday, some will be by your side for a short time and others will be by your side for a long time. We may call any or all of those people friends.
Social media has connected more people than imaginable and those friendships are sooo important to many. One of my values is being connected and as I grow and open to new experiences, I can't fathom not being on facebook or twitter. You can never meet too many people or have too many friends.
Best friends, dearest friends, soul sisters, whatever they're called is not important. Its about how they make you feel when you're with them and when you're not. Its about how you make them feel. Friendships are about sharing, caring, feeling pain, showing love, feeling excited, having fun, listening, not judging, sharing tears and fears and most of all watching your friends grow and being happy for them.
I love meeting new people and making new friends and as I open my heart and soul and walk down my path I am excited about all the future friends I will meet. I am truly thankful for the friends I have met and cherish every moment with them.
Social media has connected more people than imaginable and those friendships are sooo important to many. One of my values is being connected and as I grow and open to new experiences, I can't fathom not being on facebook or twitter. You can never meet too many people or have too many friends.
Best friends, dearest friends, soul sisters, whatever they're called is not important. Its about how they make you feel when you're with them and when you're not. Its about how you make them feel. Friendships are about sharing, caring, feeling pain, showing love, feeling excited, having fun, listening, not judging, sharing tears and fears and most of all watching your friends grow and being happy for them.
I love meeting new people and making new friends and as I open my heart and soul and walk down my path I am excited about all the future friends I will meet. I am truly thankful for the friends I have met and cherish every moment with them.
Sunday 1 May 2011
I Love You
|The phrase I love you often rolls off your tongue when telling a spouse, child or someone very close to you. Sometimes though it is a very difficult phrase to say even to a spouse, child or someone close. Why?
I realized a month or so ago I never said I Love You to any of my siblings. I loved them, didn't I, of course but to say I love you just didn't feel right. My older sister Barb and I recently have had real heart to heart talks. After one chat I said I love you to her - it came out naturally. I didn't have to think about what I was saying it was just the right thing to say, it was the way I felt.
When you get to a level of understanding, of connection, of truth- love just happens and saying I Love you just is. So now I say I love you to my sister as easy as saying hello. I have many other relationships where I say I Love you and truly mean it as such and it feels wonderful to me to say those words to others. Whatever the fear or weakness or emotion was that was holding me back has lifted.
I know as I journey down my path to find what is really inside my body, mind and soul I will find many more true loves and will say I Love You many more times.
I realized a month or so ago I never said I Love You to any of my siblings. I loved them, didn't I, of course but to say I love you just didn't feel right. My older sister Barb and I recently have had real heart to heart talks. After one chat I said I love you to her - it came out naturally. I didn't have to think about what I was saying it was just the right thing to say, it was the way I felt.
When you get to a level of understanding, of connection, of truth- love just happens and saying I Love you just is. So now I say I love you to my sister as easy as saying hello. I have many other relationships where I say I Love you and truly mean it as such and it feels wonderful to me to say those words to others. Whatever the fear or weakness or emotion was that was holding me back has lifted.
I know as I journey down my path to find what is really inside my body, mind and soul I will find many more true loves and will say I Love You many more times.
Saturday 30 April 2011
Look In The Mirror
So often I would look at my daughter and say how cute or pretty or beautiful she looked. I often saw my friends the same way. When I looked in the mirror I just saw a mom, a women. Or sometimes I just saw an overweight person, greying hair, flabby, age lines etc etc etc. We all do that, we look and see what we think are faults, the negatives we don't like about ourselves. Even though my daughter and husband complimented me on my looks I never really believed them as true.
Well, this past Friday I got ready for work followed the same routine I've done for years with one big difference. When I finished washing my hands I looked up into the mirror and I said to myself god, I look fantastic !!! I saw a great lookin women, I was glowing!! I felt happy, alive- I felt good!
The mirror always did show me truth, for some reason I chose not to see it. I have lost weight, gained confidence, my negative thoughts are diminishing rapidly, I love who I'm becoming, I love my life and I love myself and for the 1st time in a long time I knew I looked good. I love looking in the mirror and I now see the truth.
I am lucky to be me because of the love, positive comments, support, guidance and connectedness with you. Thank you. I can't wait to continue down my path to discover more about my body, mind and soul.
Well, this past Friday I got ready for work followed the same routine I've done for years with one big difference. When I finished washing my hands I looked up into the mirror and I said to myself god, I look fantastic !!! I saw a great lookin women, I was glowing!! I felt happy, alive- I felt good!
The mirror always did show me truth, for some reason I chose not to see it. I have lost weight, gained confidence, my negative thoughts are diminishing rapidly, I love who I'm becoming, I love my life and I love myself and for the 1st time in a long time I knew I looked good. I love looking in the mirror and I now see the truth.
I am lucky to be me because of the love, positive comments, support, guidance and connectedness with you. Thank you. I can't wait to continue down my path to discover more about my body, mind and soul.
Friday 29 April 2011
Pictures Are Worth a Thousand Words
As I walked through the mall and came to the camera store, I smiled thinking of all the good pictures and bad pictures I've taken over the years. All the good and bad pictures I've seen from others and marvelled at how small a camera can be now a days.
In 1981 I bought my first camera. A Cannon AE1 SLR, a big heavy manual camera that I thought was going to make me the next Peter Parker. Not the super part the good photographer part. I was keen to learn and did a lot of reading about lighting, aperature settings, focus, etc. I had a lot of fun for a few years, but my daughter was born in 1984 so priorities quickly change. I lost interest, I stopped seeing real beauty in things, I stopped seeing color etc. Last Christmas my husband wanted to buy me whole new gear, he must of known something I didn't at that time because I still wasn't really interested.
Lately my interest has peeked again. Maybe because of facebook, twitter etc. people are posting more pictures, changing their profile pics and uploading pics for others to see whether using Instagram or the many other tools out there. But I think what has really grabbed me are the incredible pictures I have seen from friends. Brandi P. shows me a picture and I read a thousand words from it. A clear and vivid story is always presented in her shots. Marietta B. a friend from Germany has the eye for design and clarity in her shots that make me say "wow" for each and every one of them.
I again see the beauty in black and white and color is vivid seeing a million different hues. I realize the people who can tell me a 1000 word story from their pictures have a talent I may never know, but there is starting to be a slowly rising desire to try. I would be happy with a 1 word descriptive for my pictures for now and one day I hope a thousand words describes what I see through the lens of my body mind and soul as I journey to create my life and refind me.
In 1981 I bought my first camera. A Cannon AE1 SLR, a big heavy manual camera that I thought was going to make me the next Peter Parker. Not the super part the good photographer part. I was keen to learn and did a lot of reading about lighting, aperature settings, focus, etc. I had a lot of fun for a few years, but my daughter was born in 1984 so priorities quickly change. I lost interest, I stopped seeing real beauty in things, I stopped seeing color etc. Last Christmas my husband wanted to buy me whole new gear, he must of known something I didn't at that time because I still wasn't really interested.
Lately my interest has peeked again. Maybe because of facebook, twitter etc. people are posting more pictures, changing their profile pics and uploading pics for others to see whether using Instagram or the many other tools out there. But I think what has really grabbed me are the incredible pictures I have seen from friends. Brandi P. shows me a picture and I read a thousand words from it. A clear and vivid story is always presented in her shots. Marietta B. a friend from Germany has the eye for design and clarity in her shots that make me say "wow" for each and every one of them.
I again see the beauty in black and white and color is vivid seeing a million different hues. I realize the people who can tell me a 1000 word story from their pictures have a talent I may never know, but there is starting to be a slowly rising desire to try. I would be happy with a 1 word descriptive for my pictures for now and one day I hope a thousand words describes what I see through the lens of my body mind and soul as I journey to create my life and refind me.
Thursday 28 April 2011
What Is Time?
Today my daughter questioned, "why there is never enough time" to do all the things in a day we want to do. She decided in the end not to fret over it, but just let it happen, whatever got done -great, if something didn't get done today there was always tomorrow.
I started thinking about time and its relevance in a day. We start each day based on what time we need to get up, what time do we eat breakfast, what time is coffee break, what time is dinner, what time, what time what time. Now I realize we need some sence of structured time to function reasonably in our crazy world, but why don't we let our bodies tell time for us. Why don't we sleep when we are tired and why don't we eat when we are truly hungry and not because time says so.
I believe time happens faster than we can keep up to it anyway and we never catch up to the current time. We have a deja vu, like this has already happened, or I've been here before to show us time has gone by.
So don't think so much about time - it is only a guideline, a tool to help us navigate through our current life. We don't know how much time we will have on this earth, don't worry about it just find pleasure/happiness whatever that is to you, in each second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year....
I started thinking about time and its relevance in a day. We start each day based on what time we need to get up, what time do we eat breakfast, what time is coffee break, what time is dinner, what time, what time what time. Now I realize we need some sence of structured time to function reasonably in our crazy world, but why don't we let our bodies tell time for us. Why don't we sleep when we are tired and why don't we eat when we are truly hungry and not because time says so.
I believe time happens faster than we can keep up to it anyway and we never catch up to the current time. We have a deja vu, like this has already happened, or I've been here before to show us time has gone by.
So don't think so much about time - it is only a guideline, a tool to help us navigate through our current life. We don't know how much time we will have on this earth, don't worry about it just find pleasure/happiness whatever that is to you, in each second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year....
Defining moments
Defining Moment
Sometimes in our lives there are defining moments. Moments where we are directly inolved in a life changing event- the birth of child- the death of a family member.
Then there are times when a life changing event happens around us in the world we know and it affects us because we are part of this world- 9/11- electing a new prime minister- the demolishing of the Berlin Wall.
Then there are times in our lives when a defining moment happens to someone close to us that affects who we are because of their relationship with us- a graduation- a spiritual realization- a final divorce.
We create are own lives by being open, trusting and eliminating fears. And as we travel down our own paths defining moments will enter. Sometimes changes our path, sometimes haulting our path for a while and sometimes giving affirmation that we are on the right path.
Watch for, listen to, acknowledge and grow with each defining moment that touches you.
Sometimes in our lives there are defining moments. Moments where we are directly inolved in a life changing event- the birth of child- the death of a family member.
Then there are times when a life changing event happens around us in the world we know and it affects us because we are part of this world- 9/11- electing a new prime minister- the demolishing of the Berlin Wall.
Then there are times in our lives when a defining moment happens to someone close to us that affects who we are because of their relationship with us- a graduation- a spiritual realization- a final divorce.
We create are own lives by being open, trusting and eliminating fears. And as we travel down our own paths defining moments will enter. Sometimes changes our path, sometimes haulting our path for a while and sometimes giving affirmation that we are on the right path.
Watch for, listen to, acknowledge and grow with each defining moment that touches you.
Wednesday 9 March 2011
My Body - a need to change
January 2010 I stepped on a scale after committing to a Biggest Looser weight loss challenge. Thank goodness it was just a family challenge is what I thought. But when I finally stepped on the scale and saw 171 lbs. at 5 ft. 4 inches tall, I just about fainted. How did I get so heavy, why, when and I'm going to be just like my mother, headed for medical disaster.
I only lost 8 lbs in 5 months. I was still unhappy with my body. I was such an active kid, played all kinds of sports in my teens and graduated with a Bachelor of Recreation Degree. Movement, sport, fun, active living - all the things I loved to do. Why did I stop?
I continued to slowly loose wt. up to about 15 lbs, but my body looked tired, old and week. By chance my daughter gave me the name of a pesonal trainer to email. Someone she hadn't met, but heard about. I went to Wendy's website and decided thats it- I'm emailing her for help- I knew this had to be the first step. I started just after Christmas of 2010- I wish I would have taken a biggest looser type of photo - just for me. Just as a reminder of my starting point.- 3 months into it and I am noticing changes to my weight, inches lost, clothes are so baggy- I feel I'm on a good journey for my new body---next my mind and soul.
I only lost 8 lbs in 5 months. I was still unhappy with my body. I was such an active kid, played all kinds of sports in my teens and graduated with a Bachelor of Recreation Degree. Movement, sport, fun, active living - all the things I loved to do. Why did I stop?
I continued to slowly loose wt. up to about 15 lbs, but my body looked tired, old and week. By chance my daughter gave me the name of a pesonal trainer to email. Someone she hadn't met, but heard about. I went to Wendy's website and decided thats it- I'm emailing her for help- I knew this had to be the first step. I started just after Christmas of 2010- I wish I would have taken a biggest looser type of photo - just for me. Just as a reminder of my starting point.- 3 months into it and I am noticing changes to my weight, inches lost, clothes are so baggy- I feel I'm on a good journey for my new body---next my mind and soul.
Tuesday 8 March 2011
A New Journey
The first time you try something new- fear is front and present. Look, breathe, fight though fear to find strength. I am on a new journey to find strength in my body, mind and soul. Today was about opening up and deciding to let others listen as I gain acceptance, love, peace, courage, knowledge, happiness.......
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