Shakespeare's Question?

To Be or Not to Be…..

One of my recent lessons learned is that events happen all the time, all around us and how we react to those events is what makes us happy or unhappy. Why would we want to be unhappy? I don’t think anyone, prefers to be unhappy, or chooses to be unhappy on purpose.

So why then do we react to things/situations/events in such a way that makes us unhappy? Someone once asked me, why do you react in such a negative way to circumstances? How does that make you feel? How does that make the people you are with feel? Yikes, I hadn’t thought about it and that was one of my big lessons. Wake up and be aware of your thoughts. 

How I react to things is my choice. If I approach life (each and every event) with an open loving heart, I feel happy and the people I am around also feel happy. So why aren’t we ALL happy ALL the time? Why aren’t we living in a euphoric, Yoko and John love the world way.

Well we can, we all can if we choose to. However most often we let the events of the external world dictate how we will feel. We listen to our egotistical mind and allow those thoughts to be what we react to. In his book, “The Untethered Soul The Journey Beyond Yourself”, Michael A. Singer suggests once you decide you want to be unconditionally happy, something inevitably will happen that challenges you. It is this test of your commitment to being happy that is exactly what stimulates an awaking within and true growth. 

We know a million things are going to happen to you or you will be a part of in your life. The real question is what are you going to think when these things happen? They are just things/events. Good, bad, ugly we categorize them. Be happy that you have experienced them. Don’t listen to your ego thoughts and create drama, sadness, hurt to yourself or others. Realize you are the observer of those thoughts and let them go. Don’t hold onto them, they will only make you suffer. 

Commit to being happy and you will learn all about your mind, your heart, and your soul. Every time you start to feel unhappy, let it go, keep your heart open and if you do you will experience life at a different level. So it really is a simple choice; 

Do you want to be happy or not?

There Is No Key To Happiness, The Door Is Always Open By J. Johnson, picture courtesy of therocketdream May 5, 2012

 There is no key to happiness, the door is always open. 

Many of us throughout the world are on our own journey's toward peace, fulfillment, and most of all happiness, even though we know that engaging on this journey is a commitment for the rest of our lifetime. On this road to happiness and fulfillment a person must be able to realize and accept a variety of things. One of these things is that a person must realize who they are, and that true happiness will only be achieved if they are willing to be themselves and not who others may want them to be. 

What is Maca?

Maca (Lepidium meyenii) is a hearty root vegetable grown in the high Andes of Bolivia and Peru. The locals have been using maca for hundreds of years for its nutritional and medicinal properties, for power as an aphrodisiac, energy enhancer and hormonal balancer

Nurtional Profile:

A dietary staple for the local people of the Andes, maca is rich in nutrients, containing 31 different minerals, amino acids, antioxidants, alkaloids and sterols. Maca is an adaptogen- a substance which brings the body to heightened state of resistance to disease. Studies suggest that it has a balancing effect on the hypothalamus, which in turn balances other endocrine glands in the body.

Clinical Research:

Maca root has flourished for thousands of years in the high Andes at altitudes up to 14,000 feet in extreme climatic conditions where few other plants can survive a single season. Scientists suggest the maca’s remarkabler endurance may help to explain its energizing and adaptogenic properites. Peruvian and Chinese researchers have conducted clinical tests on both humans and animals verifying the maca capacity to strengthen the libido and increase sperm count.

For Women:
Bolivian natives have traditionally turned to Maca root to treat a variety of female health problems, from infertility to menstrual dysfunction and menopausal difficulties. In North America, some naturopaths and clinicians suggest Maca as a safe alternative to HRT (hormone replacement therapy), for balancing hormones and improving sexual function.

For Men:
The native peoples of Bolivia and Peru have used Maca root as a libido enhancer and reproductive aid for thousands of years. Since being "rediscovered by modern science" Maca supplements have become popular as a safe and natural way to improve sexual vitality, desire and performance.

Other

Maca has been cultivated in the Andes for thousand of years. It is extremely rich nutritionally and contains 31 different minerals along with amino acids, antioxidants, alkaloids and sterols.

Maca flourishes in conditions where few other plants can survive, at altitudes above 14,000 feet, through freezing winds and blistering heat. This tolerance to extremes may help explain its potent healing and energizing properties.

PS- my favourite way of eating maca is in a Macasure chocolate bar! Its good for my body, mind and soul!

Listen to the Peace and Truth Within

“The mind can go in a thousand directions, but on this beautiful path, I walk in peace.
With each step, the wind blows. With each step, a flower blooms.”
~Thich Nhat Hanh

Interesting isn't it. When you take a look back you can now say, "oh ya I remember that" and think about why it happened, who came into your life at that point, the lesson's you've learned from it. There are no coincidences. Everything happens for a reason, everyone that comes into your life is for a reason.

I had a great chat with someone I recently met. He has a career that does not fulfil him, he knows he is meant to be doing something else. He told me he felt really good around food and wine. He loves to smell it, taste it, describe it and write about it. Wine in particular. So he took a couple of courses and loved them, passing each level onto the next. Now he is at a point where he needs to take the one last big step to get to where he wants to be. A Sommelier! Thats fantastic I said, I can hear how passionate you are about this change. But I also hear some hesitation, tell me about that.

My friend started in on struggling with the unknown of moving ahead. Leaving the security of one job for something maybe he won't be good at. He worried about letting others down. He said he is fighting himself on moving ahead, fear that he is making the wrong journey.

Wow, was my first response, then I sat back and smiled and realized he was exactly at the spot I was last year. He was saying almost word for word what I said, how I felt. I was so fortunate to have a beautiful young soul guide me. Ask me the tough questions, tell me about the ego, fear, having a vision, emotions, aligning your actions with whats inside you.

By the end of our conversation he agreed to stop fighting and let things be. He agreed that preparing himself for the right moment is what he needs to focus on. Opportunities will come later. My friend said he feels the passion for food and wine inside his heart. It feels right he said. He is going to take the next step.

So whats the problem I countered back? My friend laughed and said I just had to talk it out. Thanks for listening and asking the right questions. We finished our coffee and I was grateful to be the one asking the tough questions and helping him to peel back a few more layers to understand a deeper soul.

One last question he said, what if I fail?  What is failure I asked? He had a hard time defining it, but didn't want to let others down. Then don't have the thought of failure in your mind I said. He looked back at me and said, oh I know I will be successful, it just might take a bit of time. Enjoy the journey I said and don't worry so much about the destination. You will arrive.

Oh and if you "fail", try again!

My Partner, My Soul Mate

I love it when:

you don’t shave 

you whisper sweet shit in my ear. yes I want that

when you surprise me with a single rose on no special occasion

you send a limo for me on date night with a note that says........

you passionately hold me and tell me you love me

you take me for a Winter walk through a park on a Sunday afternoon

you share a good bottle of red wine with me on Friday night in front of the fire and we talk about our passion for life, our goals, our wishes, our future

we exercise together and I see how hard you work your body, not a whimpy, half assed workout but a strong willed workout.

we meet for lunch in a downtown resto neither of us have ever been to.

we go to a movie 

we go to bar and listen to a band

we have dinner parties 

we go to a beach and lay in the sand

we meet friends after work for drinks

we have a favorite lounge we can go to and talk, laugh, share.

we work together to create a home. Not a house but a warm, cozy inviting home

we support each others hobbies.

we have the hottest sex 

we support our community, our city 

we volunteer to help at or participate in events that our friends are involved with

we mountain bike together

we ski together

we make each other dinners- because we want to not because we have to

we make each other laugh

we make each other cry

you play the guitar for me

we give each other a massage because it feels so good

we sit on the hood of the car outside the city and watch the sun set on a warm summer night

you are spontaneous

you are a mans man, take charge kind of guy

you are confident when I am not

we face fears together

we embrace each others individuality

I feel connected to you

Exercise Reverses Aging in Muscle

As I get older I get wiser. One thing I know for sure is that exercise is the key no matter what age I am. It is engrained as part of me and what I do. I hope you understand the importance of exercise too. Here is a great article describing what happens to muscle as we age and how to keep that muscle strong. Exercise Reverses Aging in Muscle


Stay strong and healthy!

PLAY

is not just for kids! I was was reading an article the other day about play and how we forget as we get older that we can exercise because it is fun. Not because we want to loose weight, build muscle or look good in a bikini. A huge number of adults don't exercise because they haven't found a form of movement that they enjoy doing.

When I was at Crossfit Winnipeg the other day I was sooo excited when I saw on the board rope climbs. I hadn't roped climbed in months. With nervous anticipation I swung my right foot around the rope a couple of times, jumped up and grabbed the rope as high above my head as I could. I immediately brought my knees up and my left foot stepped onto the rope that dangled over my right. Again I reached up with my hands and pulled. Before I knew it I scampered up to the 15 ft mark and slowly hand over hand retreated to the ground. EXILLERATING!!! Damn that was so FUN!!! Before the class was over I had scampered up all 3 sizes of rope right to the top of the beam!!! Its the challenge of doing an activity that is fun = PLAY.

Maybe thats why I love getting on my road bike and just heading out on a sunny day, down an endless highway. It reminds me of being a kid jumping on my bike and just riding, no destination, no time line. Just riding for fun = PLAY

When I see ads for a Mud Run, an obstacle course through a bush, or an Adventure Race of mountain biking and canoeing, a High Ropes course(which I've been on and is play to the nth degree!), or other activities that sound challenging and fun, the first thing I think of = PLAY.

When I go to the beach I love to bring a disk or football or some sort of equipment to throw around in the water. Swim and dive and float and plash = PLAY

When my daughter was younger, we would kick a soccer ball around, play badminton, tag, rollerblade, walk, play on the monkey bars at a school ground. So many activities that just keeps our body moving, keeps us feeling good. So whatever age or ability, find something you enjoy, something that is fun something you do just to =PLAY!

In Europe there a number of parks and playgrounds created for adults popping up as governments want older adults to stay healthy by playing.

Playtime for Grandma: Council opens new playground for the over-60s

By NIALL FIRTH

Last updated at 14:05 02 February 2008

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Like most playgrounds, it is filled with smiling faces and laughter.

But these faces have seen more of life than you might expect, and the laughter is a little more mature in tone.

Britain's first playground for the over-60s opens today in Manchester.

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60 going on six: Vivien Backhouse and Peggy Yuill go for a swing in the Older People's Play Area in Dam Head

Instead of slides and roundabouts, it is equipped with machines specially designed to provide gentle exercise for different parts of the body such as hips, legs and torso.

The Massage offers upper body exercise, the Skate trains leg muscles, the Ski works the hips, while the Press tones the stomach and legs.

There are also stations for pull-ups, push-ups and pedalling and, to stretch the mind as well as the body, engravings of quotes from famous philosophers dotted around the park.

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Local resident Joan Fitzgerald stretches her legs in the playground

The playground, based on a German idea, was built by the residents' association in Dam Head Park, Blackley.

It cost £15,000 and was funded by the local housing management company. For many young children, the trip to the park with the grandparents may never be the same again.

While they play in the neighbouring children's playground, they will be able to watch their oldies over the fence having just as much fun as them.

Residents' association chairman Joan FitzGerald said: "When we tested it all the people we took in were over 70 and I have never heard so much laughing. I believe you are never too old to play and this also helps keep you fit."

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Swinging 60s: Thigh training while (left) even the infirm can benefit

Peggy Yuill, 74, one of the test group, said: "It makes you feel 21 again."

Gordon Lishman, director general of Age Concern, said: "A well-designed fitness park could be a great way to encourage older people to exercise and socialise.

"Many older people aren't exercising enough and we are really keen for local authorities to offer a range of accessible and affordable facilities that promote physical activity in later life."

So by yourself or with a buddy, weekday or weekend, get you PLAY on!!!!!!

Marriage

is a relationship that takes working together, like a three legged race. I'll explain later. Funny but when you first meet and fall in love with someone, do you ask them what their values are? Not many of us do, but I learned recently that is one of the topics couples should talk about before they are wed.

Once you understand that your core values are very similar, the rest should be easy peasy right? Well a marriage isn't a static relationship, because  you and I are not static beings. We grow, change, evolve, so why wouldn't our marriage relationship. It does, but when change occurs it takes a whole bunch of open honest communication to keep couples from moving in the wrong directions. Once you are married and figure out values are the same, the chances are you are right for each other as long as there isn't abuse or an addiction in the relationship.

I've been married for 14 years this August to a wonderful supportive, loving man, but our relationship has had ups and downs. Recently the downs were greater than the ups, added with house renovations my husband and I needed a time out! Sounds funny, but we were at such an impasse with the direction our lives were taking, our communication or lack there of, our connecting to each other, period.

We decided to see a marriage counsellor and boy it was the best thing we ever did. Sometimes it just takes a third party to help break down the wall we create and help us relearn how to connect and communicate. The marriage counsellor, reading many relationship articles and the knowing that our values were very similar has brought us back to a loving, communicative, supportive marriage. We have a deep love and respect for each other. We know we both still have some work to do so we can become the happily ever after couple we want to be, but we are willing to do the work.

Some of what we learned was:(1) be open and honest with your communication (2) ask don't demand from the other person (3) reflect on why a certain emotion has surfaced when your spouse says                      something (4) know you can't change your spouse, you can only change yourself (5) its okay to be an individual with your own goals,  needs, wants as long as you communicate that your spouse (6) Live life to the fullest with your spouse (7) don't be afraid to ask for third party help- if more couples did- divorce lawyers wouldn't be soooo busy.

Think about your marriage as a 3 legged race. Your inner leg is tied to your spouses inner leg and your outer legs are free to move as they please, swinging outward, stepping back, high knees etc- your individuality. Your inner legs are a bit more in sync- heading straight ahead. However if one spouse has a stronger pull to one side all legs must move in that direction or you fall down. Falling down is okay and sometimes needed, but remember with good, open communication you and your spouse can get back up, support each other and move ahead. 

Its not about the end of the race its about being passionate, travelling, sharing, learning, the journey you take to get wherever you are going!!!

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201112/are-you-the-right-mate