The summer of 2011 has sure been one to remember for a lot of people I know, myself included. A lot of changes have happened already and there is still a good month left of warm, sunny beach days for the winds of change to blow through.
I know people who have fallen in love, fallen out of love, reconnected with their true spirit, lost loved ones, renewed old friendships, received bad news about a loved ones health, started running for the first time, ran a marathon, an ironman, bought a road bike, changed jobs, changed the way they feel about themselves, lost weight, changed hair colour, got a tattoo, moved, bought a boat, etc. It just seems to me that this summer brought about a lot of change for a lot of people.
Maybe this type of change the fluidness of life has always been there and I'm just more in tune, living more in the moment and more connected to more people than I ever have been. I feel and see a lot more energy, emotion and connectedness with people.
I've awakened my spirit immensely and challenged my body and acknowledged my thoughts. I've moved forward with my dreams and visions for what I want in life. I know I'm on the right path as I've had many deja vus this summer. I've had many learning moments which created growth each and every time and I cherish those learning moments and know a lot more lessons are to be learned.
I've spent more time at the beach on the sand, in the sun and in the water than ever before. I lay on the grass, appreciate the trees, listen to the birds and squirrels and smell the flowers. I love my summer life and can't wait to create the rest of it. I appreciate all the people I have met and conversed with this summer and can't wait to meet and chat with more of my soul mates.
Summer is a great time to feel the warmth and love from within, appreciate, learn, grow, feel, move, touch, listen, laugh--- LIVE.
Monday, 8 August 2011
Tuesday, 12 July 2011
Know Your Shadow
So here I was just going along with life as it was a big bowl of cherries. Sweet and juicy and all is well; well only half was well. The amazing thing to me is that I knew what I was doing but didn't want to face it I'm sure. It took an amazingly intuitive friend to be honest with me as to how they saw me and it wasn't real pretty.
Over the past little while I was trying to make my life so perfect, so fun, so good, that I wasn't willing to see anything else. What I actually was doing was causing a split within me, a seperation of my conscious and unconscious state. Instead of reflecting and questioning and working through the negative feelings of the unconscious, I was hiding them, pushing them back deeper and deeper. After all they were the "bad" and I wanted to be good, right? Well what I was actually doing was allowing the negatives of the unconscious to grow and have power over me, without me realizing it.
It took a lot of tears, alone time, really pulling deep into the fears and all the negative emotions and coming to the understanding the self is me and I am the conscious and unconscious together- that make me whole. I can't give power to the negatives but must recognize and work through the emotions which in turn will lesson their power over me.
I felt like I tore through a wall of seperation to start rebuilding, recreating my true self. For 2 days I barely ate, slept or talked. Just questioned, wrote and allowed feelings to truly rise. So instead of limiting myself, limiting others, feeling scared to be on my own, feeling fear of not being truly loved or fear of the future, guilt, shame, attachment, etc etc and there were alot I was trying to push deep down. I know by recognizing and dealing with the unconscious will allow me to grow and create the life I truly will love.
Now that the wall has been dismantled, the work begins to rebuild, recreate a new self. I am thank full for the people around me who ask me what they can do to help. Really a little energy healing, a little guidance from friends and a whole lot of choices to make. Understanding myself is the first step in understanding the world I live in and how I can do what makes me happy, be successful, help my community, be a loved one to others and love others openly and deeply. I need to figure out my vision, what I truly want, what my values are and start living towards the life that will fullfil me during this time on earth.
The self is fluid and changes as we experience and learn and grow and that is exciting to me. I know I am whole when I recognize, admit and workthrough the feelings in my shadow which is an inspiring part of me just like the conscious is. There is ongoing work, a constant reflection of feelings, but the recognition of the shadow was huge for me and I will continue to get to know my whole self the conscious and unconscious together as one.
As I follow my path on my never ending journey this is a time I will look back and say I learned a huge lesson, I am so grateful for as it will truly help me awaken my body, mind and soul.
I am grateful for the writings of Deepak Chopra- I have learned so much
Over the past little while I was trying to make my life so perfect, so fun, so good, that I wasn't willing to see anything else. What I actually was doing was causing a split within me, a seperation of my conscious and unconscious state. Instead of reflecting and questioning and working through the negative feelings of the unconscious, I was hiding them, pushing them back deeper and deeper. After all they were the "bad" and I wanted to be good, right? Well what I was actually doing was allowing the negatives of the unconscious to grow and have power over me, without me realizing it.
It took a lot of tears, alone time, really pulling deep into the fears and all the negative emotions and coming to the understanding the self is me and I am the conscious and unconscious together- that make me whole. I can't give power to the negatives but must recognize and work through the emotions which in turn will lesson their power over me.
I felt like I tore through a wall of seperation to start rebuilding, recreating my true self. For 2 days I barely ate, slept or talked. Just questioned, wrote and allowed feelings to truly rise. So instead of limiting myself, limiting others, feeling scared to be on my own, feeling fear of not being truly loved or fear of the future, guilt, shame, attachment, etc etc and there were alot I was trying to push deep down. I know by recognizing and dealing with the unconscious will allow me to grow and create the life I truly will love.
Now that the wall has been dismantled, the work begins to rebuild, recreate a new self. I am thank full for the people around me who ask me what they can do to help. Really a little energy healing, a little guidance from friends and a whole lot of choices to make. Understanding myself is the first step in understanding the world I live in and how I can do what makes me happy, be successful, help my community, be a loved one to others and love others openly and deeply. I need to figure out my vision, what I truly want, what my values are and start living towards the life that will fullfil me during this time on earth.
The self is fluid and changes as we experience and learn and grow and that is exciting to me. I know I am whole when I recognize, admit and workthrough the feelings in my shadow which is an inspiring part of me just like the conscious is. There is ongoing work, a constant reflection of feelings, but the recognition of the shadow was huge for me and I will continue to get to know my whole self the conscious and unconscious together as one.
As I follow my path on my never ending journey this is a time I will look back and say I learned a huge lesson, I am so grateful for as it will truly help me awaken my body, mind and soul.
I am grateful for the writings of Deepak Chopra- I have learned so much
Tuesday, 28 June 2011
Introspection
I thought last week was a bad week for me. I seemed to have tore the miniscus in my left knee according to my physio (whom I would trust with my life). There was lots of swelling and pain and the use of crutches. For 3 days while I mostly layed on my back with leg iced and elevated I thought, I cried, I sang to myself but mostly I felt sad that I could not do the things I loved.
I could not ride my road bike, I could not go to crossfit, I could not go to yoga. I could not be active the way I wanted to be. When I closed my eyes and reached for the inner peace within, how precious my health was, kept coming at me in my thoughts. How fortunate I am that I can go ride, go to the gym, practice yoga and that every chance I get to do any activities, I will do at my very best, I will push myself to give it my all and never say I can't. I will always try at 100%.
I felt in my soul how important my health was and being active was to me. A true value in my heart that I want to nourish and grow. I've had many minor injuries in the past, but never looked at it quite this way before. I looked back at the times when I gave up, didn't push myself to do just one more, didn't push beyond the wall.
While looking inside myself I also saw that my injury was just that an injury, something that will heal. Why was I being such a baby over cartilidge. I wasn't loosing a limb, I wasn't being diagnosed with a disease, I wasn't given a timeline to live. My injury is nothing compared to what some people are going through. I saw that I am so fortunate and a small injury like mine pales in comparison to others.
The physical pain and egotiscal sadness I felt, is so minor compared to what Brandi and her family were going through. The unknown diagnosis, care plan, future. The strength from within that Brandi has, to learn, live and grow through her father in laws experience.
Introspection gave me the words, the peace, the love, the healing from within so as I journey to awaken my body mind and soul I will feel more of the connection an alignment with my true values which will allow me to give more of my love, strength, peace and healing to others like Brandi and her family.
I could not ride my road bike, I could not go to crossfit, I could not go to yoga. I could not be active the way I wanted to be. When I closed my eyes and reached for the inner peace within, how precious my health was, kept coming at me in my thoughts. How fortunate I am that I can go ride, go to the gym, practice yoga and that every chance I get to do any activities, I will do at my very best, I will push myself to give it my all and never say I can't. I will always try at 100%.
I felt in my soul how important my health was and being active was to me. A true value in my heart that I want to nourish and grow. I've had many minor injuries in the past, but never looked at it quite this way before. I looked back at the times when I gave up, didn't push myself to do just one more, didn't push beyond the wall.
While looking inside myself I also saw that my injury was just that an injury, something that will heal. Why was I being such a baby over cartilidge. I wasn't loosing a limb, I wasn't being diagnosed with a disease, I wasn't given a timeline to live. My injury is nothing compared to what some people are going through. I saw that I am so fortunate and a small injury like mine pales in comparison to others.
The physical pain and egotiscal sadness I felt, is so minor compared to what Brandi and her family were going through. The unknown diagnosis, care plan, future. The strength from within that Brandi has, to learn, live and grow through her father in laws experience.
Introspection gave me the words, the peace, the love, the healing from within so as I journey to awaken my body mind and soul I will feel more of the connection an alignment with my true values which will allow me to give more of my love, strength, peace and healing to others like Brandi and her family.
Thursday, 9 June 2011
COURAGE
My best pal Wendy had a photoshoot done a few weeks ago and I had the wonderful opportunity to see it happen live. I learned alot about cameras, lighting and background. I learned about makeup, hair and eye lashes and how much patience it takes and how many wardrobe changes are needed for a shoot. But what I learned most about was the courage it takes to be the model.
As a sexy, fit woman Wendy is so comfortable within her own skin. She likes the way she looks and really doesn't give a damn what others think. I like that attitude. Wendy's pictures exuded her confidence with her body, mind and soul which I so admire. Some women looked at the pictures and were very judgemental instantly. Not seeing the beautiful, fit, sexy woman. Not seeing the courage it took to model. Some women were jealous I'm sure, angry that they don't have the courage to be the model.
Some women like me, saw the pictures and said, shit I'd love to have a body that I feel so good and confident with that I too would have the courage to do a photoshoot. There is no more pure, whole beauty than a woman, a fit, sexy woman half naked. I know all the guys would agree.
As I awaken my body, mind and soul I hope one day to allow my courage to rise and open enough to allow me to be the model. To show my fit, sexy body in photos just as I want! For people to see the shots and say that is a beautiful picture and for me to say it took a lot of courage and I'm glad I did it!
As a sexy, fit woman Wendy is so comfortable within her own skin. She likes the way she looks and really doesn't give a damn what others think. I like that attitude. Wendy's pictures exuded her confidence with her body, mind and soul which I so admire. Some women looked at the pictures and were very judgemental instantly. Not seeing the beautiful, fit, sexy woman. Not seeing the courage it took to model. Some women were jealous I'm sure, angry that they don't have the courage to be the model.
Some women like me, saw the pictures and said, shit I'd love to have a body that I feel so good and confident with that I too would have the courage to do a photoshoot. There is no more pure, whole beauty than a woman, a fit, sexy woman half naked. I know all the guys would agree.
As I awaken my body, mind and soul I hope one day to allow my courage to rise and open enough to allow me to be the model. To show my fit, sexy body in photos just as I want! For people to see the shots and say that is a beautiful picture and for me to say it took a lot of courage and I'm glad I did it!
Tuesday, 31 May 2011
Decisions
When someone close to me is struggling with negative emotions, having a hard time making a decision or feeling unsettled but doesn't know why, I am there as a mother, wife, daughter , sister, friend to lean on. I think I was born to be a listener, a non judger, a sounding board someone who will be curious, to help you find your own answers.
When I am struggling to find an answer I turn my thoughts inward. I can't let anyone tell me what to do, whatever decisions I make have to feel right in my soul. Then and only then can I move forward with my life. I too look for someone to talk out my decision, but it is ultimately my decision, for me.
Recently I've been faced with a few decisions, a few forks in the road. Which path to take, what is the right thing to do, what feels right in my soul, not what my ego is telling me. The more I understand my false beliefs, my fears, my values and start creating the life that is fullfilling and whole the more settled I feel.
There are no less decisions to be made, but I think I embrace making them, they are not a chore but an opportunity. I now look forward to more opportunities to help me down my path to find what is really inside my mind, body and soul.
When I am struggling to find an answer I turn my thoughts inward. I can't let anyone tell me what to do, whatever decisions I make have to feel right in my soul. Then and only then can I move forward with my life. I too look for someone to talk out my decision, but it is ultimately my decision, for me.
Recently I've been faced with a few decisions, a few forks in the road. Which path to take, what is the right thing to do, what feels right in my soul, not what my ego is telling me. The more I understand my false beliefs, my fears, my values and start creating the life that is fullfilling and whole the more settled I feel.
There are no less decisions to be made, but I think I embrace making them, they are not a chore but an opportunity. I now look forward to more opportunities to help me down my path to find what is really inside my mind, body and soul.
Thursday, 12 May 2011
The Soul
About a year ago I decided I needed to change my life. I knew the weight loss needed to happen and it has. I knew I had to change my way of thinking, my mind controlls my body so I must learn to say positive thoughts, to motivate to create a picture in my mind of who I wanted to be and this has started to happen. I think its always work and in progress and forever needs tweeking.
But I was still searching for more. My mind and body were changing but something was still missing. Through the help of a good friend I realized I wasn't connected to my soul. I needed a connection I verbalized a missing connection I just couldnt' figure out what that was.
To me it was my inner self. I was missing who I was inside, the love for myself, the openess of my soul so I could truly feel the love and light I had within. I have an amazing amount of energy within from my base to my crown and the more I feel each energy chakra opening the more I feel alive inside and the more love, light and energy I can give.
I believe in the guidance of my soul. The truth within I can not dismiss. When I follow the truth and connection I feel, all is good all is right and all is whole. As I journey to continue to understand and learn about my mind, body and soul I know I will open and embrace and create the life that feels right for me.
But I was still searching for more. My mind and body were changing but something was still missing. Through the help of a good friend I realized I wasn't connected to my soul. I needed a connection I verbalized a missing connection I just couldnt' figure out what that was.
To me it was my inner self. I was missing who I was inside, the love for myself, the openess of my soul so I could truly feel the love and light I had within. I have an amazing amount of energy within from my base to my crown and the more I feel each energy chakra opening the more I feel alive inside and the more love, light and energy I can give.
I believe in the guidance of my soul. The truth within I can not dismiss. When I follow the truth and connection I feel, all is good all is right and all is whole. As I journey to continue to understand and learn about my mind, body and soul I know I will open and embrace and create the life that feels right for me.
Thursday, 5 May 2011
Why is Money so Important?
During the course of our lives here on earth we must have money to live. We know that. We go to school so we can graduate with a degree, diploma, specialized training, etc. Why - so we can get good jobs and make a lot of money, right. So often we get stuck in a job we don't even like. It makes us miserable. So we're makin money all right- and we're depressed, overweight and feel stuck!
What if we don't care about making a alot of money. What if we care more about working in a career we love even if it doesn't make a lot of money. What if material things aren't so important that we don't work full time. Maybe some people are in jobs or careers they love, then they should continue. And if material things are important to them, then great! Good for you.
I want to create my life where I am in a job that I like, I will create my own level of success on my own terms, I will spend my money on what I want. I will be passionate about what I do in life to make money, not do it because I have to. I want to get up every morning excited about going to work, to make my day worth living and if money comes from that- Great!
As I journey down my path to find what is really inside my body, mind and soul I search for my career passion, that will make my life on this earth, balanced, fullfilled and whole.
What if we don't care about making a alot of money. What if we care more about working in a career we love even if it doesn't make a lot of money. What if material things aren't so important that we don't work full time. Maybe some people are in jobs or careers they love, then they should continue. And if material things are important to them, then great! Good for you.
I want to create my life where I am in a job that I like, I will create my own level of success on my own terms, I will spend my money on what I want. I will be passionate about what I do in life to make money, not do it because I have to. I want to get up every morning excited about going to work, to make my day worth living and if money comes from that- Great!
As I journey down my path to find what is really inside my body, mind and soul I search for my career passion, that will make my life on this earth, balanced, fullfilled and whole.
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